My Story with Postpartum Anxiety

November 25, 2025•8 min read

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Trigger Warning: If you’re still moving through postpartum trauma or intense anxiety, this section may bring up some emotions. Please take care of yourself as you read. If this isn’t the right moment, you can always close this and come back whenever you feel ready.

I want to share my story with you - how I navigated intense postpartum anxiety after a traumatic C-Section with my first baby to help you shine a light on what postpartum anxiety can actually look like and to remind you that you’re not alone. This isn’t professional medical advice, but if anything here resonates and you want more support, you can sign up for The Nurture Nook Birth Series, which will be released soon. These workbooks are designed to help you gently process birth trauma and feel more grounded as you heal. And if you’re struggling right now or feel like you need more immediate help, please reach out to a professional you trust.

While many new moms experience nervousness or worry (or actually… all of us), postpartum anxiety goes deeper. It’s more than being tired or a little worried — it can show up as a persistent state of overwhelm, racing thoughts, intrusive fears, or physical symptoms, and it interferes with daily life and your connection with your baby. A clear breakdown of mood-related disorders after childbirth from Johns Hopkins Medicine notes that anxiety and intrusive thoughts are key symptoms of postpartum mood disorders¹.

Research also backs this up: in an fMRI study, mothers whose brains reacted more strongly to negative cues from their babies (versus positive ones) were more likely to develop postpartum depression and anxiety².

So yes — what you may be dealing with is valid, real, and has a name.

Postpartum anxiety symptoms infographic showing common signs such as racing thoughts, intrusive thoughts, physical symptoms, fear of leaving baby, trouble sleeping, and emotional overwhelm - Nurture Nook postpartum anxiety support.

What it looked like for me

Because sharing our lived experience helps others feel seen: here’s how it played out for me.

• I had a traumatic C-section (my first baby). Recovery alone felt like a mountain.

• I didn’t recognize postpartum anxiety until about 1 to 1½ years later.

• My brain had constant “what if” loops: What if I take her out for a walk and she suffocates in her stroller? What if she gets too hot in her sleeper? What if someone jumps out of a car and kidnaps her?

• I was terrified to drive alone with her. I didn’t drive her anywhere by myself for more than a year. I only went out with someone else.

• I couldn’t even lie on my side at night looking away from her until she was 5–6 months old — because I believed if I turned my back her risk of SIDS would go up.

• I cried a lot. Not because I didn’t feel connected to her (I did — so deeply) but because I felt her growing up so fast, and I felt sad and anxious in the same moment.

• I felt judged (in my mind and by others) for not getting out of the house, for not “doing more,” for being the mom who seemed too worried.

• Breastfeeding added another layer. I exclusively breastfed her, and she had an undiagnosed double lip tie — so she couldn’t latch well, she got gas, cried a lot, and I felt panic every time she bawled. Cluster-feeding every 30 minutes to an hour became the norm — because I was obsessively tied to making sure she gained weight and was fed.

• One day I drove 45 minutes to a park (a big step for me) and on the way back she got her bow pulled over her face in her car seat. She was unresponsive in that moment and I knew she’d suffocated. I pulled over, called a friend, exited the car, checked her — and she was fine once the bow was off. But that moment cracked something in me.

That combination of birth trauma + anxiety + breastfeeding stress + “what-if” loops = a serious postpartum anxiety journey.

Why this matters (and why you’re not weird)

First: you’re not overreacting. The research shows real brain and emotional changes happen postpartum. Studies indicate that mothers experiencing postpartum anxiety or depression show altered neural responsiveness to their infants’ emotions³ — meaning your heightened reactions or fears aren’t “in your head.” They’re part of the real, biological shifts that happen in a mother’s brain after birth.

Second: recognizing it is huge. Once I started seeing how my thoughts and fears were playing out not just as “mom being worried” but as a patterned anxiety that was affecting me and my baby, the healing began.

Third: you deserve support. Because anxiety after birth isn’t just “part of motherhood” to push through. It’s a legitimate transition, compounded by hormones, trauma, sleep deprivation, and our new identity as “mom.”

What helped me start to heal

As I geared up for baby #2 and started processing baby #1, a few things made a difference:

• Talking openly about my experience (with trusted friends, my doula and midwife while prepping for my second birth, fellow moms) so I realized I wasn’t the only one.

• Preparing for my second birth differently: unmedicated, midwife, doula and husband-supported, physiological birth view. That shift helped me reclaim trust in my body.

• Keeping my breastfeeding journey going (I’m still exclusively breastfeeding my second daughter), but also educating myself.

• Giving myself permission: “This is not the same as the baby blues. This is me doing serious emotional work.”

To the mom reading this

Maybe you’re nodding and thinking, “That is so me.” Maybe you’re still wondering if your feelings are okay.

Here’s what I want you to hear:

• It’s okay to have fear. It doesn’t make you a bad mom.

• It’s okay to not be ready to drive or go alone or feel “normal” yet.

• It’s okay to ask for help — to take a break, to hand baby off, to let someone else watch her while you rest.

• It’s okay to acknowledge the trauma of your birth, your breastfeeding journey, the early days. Because trauma matters.

• You can heal. It doesn’t have to and will not define you.

You’re doing such important work — not just “taking care of baby” but taking care of you. Every moment of fear, every tear, every “what if” — you’re allowed to sit with it, to feel it, to move through it. And you don’t have to do it alone. If you ever wonder — “Is this just me?” — you’re not alone, mama.

Here’s to healing, to getting more of your life back, to enjoying your baby without the extra weight of anxiety. You’ve got this.

Nothing here is a substitute for medical advice. If you’re worried about your feelings or thoughts, please reach out to a medical professional for support.

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Sources

Swain, J. E., Kim, P., Ho, S. S., Dayton, C. J., & Elmadih, A. (2011). Neuroendocrinology of parental response to baby-cry: Comprehensive review of the literature. Progress in Neuro-Psychopharmacology & Biological Psychiatry, 35(8), 1750–1764. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4319977/
Kim, P., Mayes, L. C., Feldman, R., Leckman, J. F., & Swain, J. E. (2020). Associations between stress exposure and new mothers’ neural response to infant cry in the postpartum period. Frontiers in Behavioral Neuroscience, 14, 104. https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC8291268/
Finnegan, M. K., Slatcher, R. B., & Laurent, H. K. (2021). Mothers’ neural response to valenced infant interactions predicts postpartum depression and anxiety. PLOS ONE, 16(4), e0250487. https://journals.plos.org/plosone/article?id=10.1371/journal.pone.0250487
Johns Hopkins Medicine. (n.d.). Baby Blues and Postpartum Depression: Mood Disorders and What New Moms Need to Know. Retrieved October 2025, from https://www.hopkinsmedicine.org/health/wellness-and-prevention/postpartum-mood-disorders-what-new-moms-need-to-know

Jordyn Giorgi

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